October 31, 2010 § Leave a comment
Ok, is this even selling something?
Wow, really, I lost brain-power at about the 12th word (counting the numbers as words). There are just so many things wrong with this ad that I’m sure I’ll miss something!
- It is one long run-on sentence
- Never start a sentence with a number
- Possibly, if you have three, no 17, no, wait, five (?) horses to sell, maybe you should write about each one individually. I can’t tell if you have 15 geldings that are all 1YO or do you have two geldings that are both 15YO? Oh, maybe it’s two, since you then use the word “both”. But it’s hard to tell… what with your absolutely shitty grammar
- And it’s nice to know you have good hay… I have good hay too… I buy it from this guy… but I don’t usually advertise what I pay for it
- I’m not sure what a “tone” is?
- I can only assume you have two bulls who buck so may be good for a rodeo
I won’t even put my list of “must have” info on here, because this person would get something like a -75% for a grade.
Come ON people! Seriously? Are you seriously fucking serious?